Last year after taking the photo for our holiday cards, I made a mental note that I should stick with a professional photographer in the future. I guess that I’m a glutton for punishment though, because for some reason, I thought that it would be easier to take the boys’ picture for our holiday card this year. “They’re older/better able to take direction,” I (erroneously) reasoned.

So, on Saturday evening my husband and I “tackled” the holiday picture. We dressed the boys in their new, cute Coco Bonbons outfits and we were all set. Or so, we thought. I think that the boys must have drunk some “silly juice” right before the shoot. Michael kept making faces. Sean kept running away. Then, they started laughing and wrestling each other. My husband was trying to act like he was a photographer – using the camera to try to get a good shot. (He didn’t get one.) Meanwhile, I went the Flip route. Even though the resolution of Flip “photos from video” isn’t as great as shots from a regular camera, I reasoned that I would at least get one good frame in the midst of the madness. I did! It took many different shots to get one though.

We took:
-horizontal shots / vertical shots
-shots in front of / to the left of / to the right of the Christmas tree
-shots of the kids leaning against the sofa with their backs to the tree

Here are a couple of the outtakes:

(Suffice it to say, we won’t be trading in our “day jobs” in order to become children’s photographers!)

At the end of the day, we were able to get one (that’s all that we needed!) picture that we liked enough to use.

(I even like the “vintage” feel of the picture due to it being from the Flip camcorder.)

Happy Holidays!

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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One of the things that my family “tackles” each November is a toy “purge”. We (okay, I) go through every toy item in the house. Toys and games that have missing pieces or that are worn out get thrown away. Toys that my kids no longer use that are in great condition go to charity (except for a select few that go to their younger cousin).

I was amazed at how much kid stuff accumulates over the course of a year. Our apartment isn’t that big yet I threw away between 6 to 8 grocery bags of toys/games/etc. Where was all of that stuff?!

Our favorite part of the purge though was the good stuff that goes to charity. I was amazed at Michael’s generosity. He gave away a lot of great items. (To be honest – part of it was his generosity, the other part was his wanting to make room for new Christmas toys!) One of my favorite sayings that I tell Michael is “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” (You’d be amazed at the “solutions” four years old kids can come up with – if I left it to Michael, my dining room table would be “toy central”!)

Anyway, I digress, here’s some of the things that we were able to give away:

Puzzles

Bag of Stuffed Animals

Legos

MORE Puzzles

Books

Leap Pads

And here are two things (the bike and the “lawnmower” - both which were loved toys) that we weren’t able to donate. They said that they don’t accept those types of toys(?!)

Rejects

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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How did my beloved dining room table become a dumping ground?! This is the same table that I wouldn’t let my family eat at for a couple of weeks (when we first bought it) out of fear that they would ruin it. This dump site kind of crept up on (clutter-phobe) me.

In any event, I woke up one day and this is what it looked like:

I identified the culprits:

-Michael: His school work stuff was getting dumped on the table (because it’s right by our door). No more – take your things to your room kid!

-Reggie (my husband): He dumps his large mail (that doesn’t fit into our mail holder that’s hanging up beside the door) on the table. No more – put it in your room dear!

-Me: Practically every week I have several things that I’m going to give away when I see various people. I leave those things on the table, so I won’t forget them on the way out of the door. No more. (I designated a gift bag where all of that stuff goes until I can give it away.)

The last thing on the table – Michael’s “Fright Light” pumpkin – gets to stay for a week or two more, since Michael is so proud of his little creation…

So here (minus the pumpkin) is what my table surface looked like in the past and will look like from now on (give or take a few carefully selected decorations!)…

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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I knew that it was coming….

Last week, Michael’s school sent home the first (of two for the year) Big Apple Fundraising, Inc. “Fundraising Drive” packet. We’re supposed to take orders from friends, relatives and co-workers. The only problem…I really don’t like selling to friends, relatives and co-workers!

I’m just not a salesperson. Previous attempts at direct sales came to mind: Mary Kay – I ended up having facial parties for my friends, but I didn’t really try to sell them anything. Then, there was Discovery Toys – oh well, Michael got some great toys out of that venture…

Anyway, I needed to come up with a game plan. So, here’s what I came up with:

-No sell/no buy policy: This will apply to all of my friends and family with school-aged kids (who will be having their own fundraisers). I won’t ask them to buy from Michael and hope that they will reciprocate by not asking me to buy items from their kids’ fundraisers. (Although I hate selling, I’m a “softie” when it comes to buying/supporting other people’s sales efforts!) Does that sound fair?

-Ask family and close friends only: I made a list of who we’d let Michael ask…our family and a few close friends (who don’t have kids – kids are expensive!). Michael (really I!) started off with the easiest person – his great aunt. She ordered 8 different items, so that was an encouraging start!

All in all, I decided to not go all “Type A” with this fundraiser. You see, kids get to pick a prize based on the number of items that they sell. By nature, I would normally aim for the top prize - sell 200+ items. I thought about the following things though.

1. Michael has (or has the capacity to get from generous family & friends) practically every prize that he could “win”.

2. At this age, Michael really isn’t doing the work (I am!).

and

3. The holiday season is rapidly approaching and already (as it is with everything going on in our economy) many people are having a hard time making financial ends meet. There are a few great deals in the sales catalog (which I’ve made a mental note of), but overall, I just don’t feel great about asking a lot of people to buy overpriced candy, cards, wrapping paper, etc. It’s just not my cup of tea…

So, that’s how I’ve decided to “tackle” this fundraising drive. How do you deal with such things?

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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My last major goal of the year is to learn how to drive. (As a background, you can read my 12/31/07 post, I Resolve to Make My Own Goals in 2008). Since it’s only a few more months in the year, I took my second step (taking the New York State Department of Motor Vehicles approved five-hour course in driving fundamentals) this past Saturday. (The first step was getting the learner’s permit, which I’ve had for over a year!).

Beforehand, I was expressing to my husband that I wasn’t sure that I could sit still for a five hour class without falling asleep. He told me that I might get “lucky” and have a teacher who condensed the information into a shorter time period. He was wrong. It was obvious from the start of the class that our instructor took his role VERY seriously. We weren’t going anywhere early.

“Every 12 ½ minutes, someone is getting killed on a highway.” That’s how the class began. For me (someone who is extra squeamish about car safety) this was not a particularly upbeat way to start the class. Throughout the seminar, our instructor “R” constantly referred to driving as a “video game” and encouraged us to develop a “war mentality”.

Throughout the class (which definitely could have been shortened – “R” spent the first hour telling us his life story!) I had to keep reminding myself…DON’T FALL ASLEEP! I did learn a few helpful/random tips like the following:

-I can measure 15 feet (the amount of space I need to park away from a fire hydrant) by counting 3 sidewalk boxes (in NYC anyway)

-American Automobile Association (AAA) is a great resource (we already have it through my husband).

And

-I should have a “The Club” type object to break my window in case I’m submerged under water in my car. It’s also helpful to have a knife (to cut off a defective seatbelt) and a flashlight in my glove compartment. “Always be prepared” was my instructor’s mantra.

During the class, two films were shown. One film was called “Crash” which focused on the importance of seatbelts, airbags, head restraints and proper baby/child restraints. (Great message, but I don’t need to see several car crashes in one film!) The second movie was about drinking and driving. In, it an 18 years old driver kills 8 of his teen friends while drinking/smoking marijuana/driving fast. As the movie ends, the judge looks at the viewer and asks us how the teen should be punished. That’s how my 5 hour class ended – we all gave our opinions regarding sentencing. What a downer! In any event, this was not an encouraging start to my driving “adventure”, but I “survived” (yay!). Now, on to the road lessons in October….wish me luck (and safe driving!)…

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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Recently, a first time mom-friend of mines was expressing that her one year old was yelling at the top of her lungs “for fun” and would laugh as soon as she came in the room. When I assured her that it was normal/nothing to worry about, she wondered aloud why there wasn’t a book that let you know things like that happened. Honestly, it would be impossible for any one book to cover everything that each kid will do, because every kid is so unique.

That made me think about the things from my week that I have to remind myself is normal/okay…

-It’s normal/okay that Michael has been sick (and got the rest of the family sick!) for the last five days. Since he was sick, I stopped by Michael’s school on Friday to pick up his homework for the weekend. Both his teacher and the school director said that I should expect for him to be sick a lot this first year of being in a group setting of kids. His teacher said she was sick all the time the first year that she taught. She gave me a couple of good practicals - wash his hands a lot; teach him not to get so close to the other kids so that he’s not breathing in their germs and get the flu shot. I think that the first two tips are easier for adults to do than kids though…I don’t want Michael to become obsessive about germs.

-It’s normal/okay that my kids have better manners than I do at times. That means that my husband and I aree raising them right! What brought this to mind is that we were celebrating my mother-in-law’s birthday on Saturday. When it was time for dessert, all of us adults were just going to cut the cake and eat it. However, we hear this little voice (Michael’s) behind us starting to sing…”Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You…” Of course, we all looked at each other and hurriedly joined in the song. Later, on the way home, I sneezed and Sean immediately said “Bless You”. I looked over at my husband who was driving and he just shook his head…Sean beats us both to the “bless you” many times!

-It’s okay that my husband (usually) has a more sober estimate of how things will work out than I do. For instance, I’m working on my holiday toy guide. In my mind, I was under the delusion that I would let my sons test some of the samples and then give them away or put them away until Christmas. My husband was like, “Yeah, right. You know that you’re the soft touch.” Well yesterday, I received the Hulk Smash hands. Even before I finished opening the box, Michael was jumping up and down yelling “Hulk Smash!” while Sean kept saying “Wow”. They both then proceeded to try to “Hulk Smash”/attack me with the hands. Very cute! There’s no way that I’m getting that toy back…

Overall, what I’ve learned/am constantly learning is that in the grand scheme of things, most day to day things are normal/okay. (To keep it all in perspective, I’m just grateful that we weren’t in the middle of a hurricane/a Wall Street crisis/ etc…)

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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Last month, all of my “tackles” involved preparing my son Michael for preschool. This month, they will all be about preparing me for the fall.

A couple of weeks ago in church, I had my hair down in curls and I was wearing a cute little white sheath dress. A single friend of mine’s said, “Wow! You look great. You look like you used to look before you were married.” “Excuse me?!” I thought. I wouldn’t have been surprised if she said “since before you had kids” (I don’t usually wear my hair down with the boys – they like to pull it and I definitely haven’t worn all white being the baby/toddler carrier that I am.)

In any event, I decided then and there to let more of the “old Kim” shine through even when I’m with my kids. (I still usually “clean up” pretty well for work/away-from-the-kids events.) This week/my first “tackle” is my hair. I had my hair cut after my second son, but it’s still long enough to play around with. So, for the fall, I’m going to have some (more) longish layers cut in and I vow (to myself) to wear my hair down more. I enlisted the expertise of my personal hair stylist, Shanelle Thomas of “Hair by Shanelle” to provide some hair care tips. A graduate of the Aveda Institute New York and past employee of the renowned Ted Gibson Salon, Shanelle’s motto is “finding beauty in simplicity”. (Since I’m Black, the tips are specific to African-American hair textures, but the principles are “universal”.)

Shanelle’s Tips
-Moisturize hair on a regular basis. The best time to add moisture to the hair is right after shampooing. When the hair is wet, it is better able to absorb the essential oils in the conditioner. Along with choosing a conditioner especially created to add moisture to the hair, add natural oils to the conditioner. Aveda’s Energizing Oil is a good pick because it is specifically formulated to add moisture to the hair. After applying the mixture of oil and conditioner place a plastic cap over the hair for at least 20 minutes. The natural heat from the scalp opens the pores and allows the oil to absorb into the hair shaft.

-For relaxed hair, protein treatments are recommended along with the above-mentioned conditioning treatment. Hair is made up of a protein called keratin. When using any sort of strong chemicals on the hair (such as relaxers and/or permanent color), the bonds of the hair are broken down and re-formed. This makes the hair weaker and less elastic. The conditioning treatment with oils is great at adding moisture which improves the hair’s elasticity and the protein treatment helps to improve the strength of the hair. A good protein treatment is Affirm 5 in 1 Reconstructor. It can be used every other time the hair is washed. Apply it along with the conditioner. (First, apply the conditioner and then apply the reconstructor over the conditioner. Place a plastic cap over the hair and let it sit for about 20 minutes — if possible, sit under a drier set at medium heat.)

-Protect your hair. If the hair is being blown dry or flat ironed, it is very important to use a thermal protectant to minimize damage done to the hair. Silken Seal by KeraCare and Smooth Infusion by Aveda are two highly recommended products.

Other Tips:
-Sleep with a silk scarf or bonnet at night in order to protect the hair and to maintain the style longer. (Cotton dries the hair out, so if you don’t like sleeping with something on your head, sleep on a silk pillowcase.)

-Limit heat styling. When possible, air-dry as much of the moisture out of the hair first and then blow-dry it to expose it to heat for the least amount of time (or skip the heat altogether and let the hair air dry).

Shanelle’ Information / Reputable Black Hair Salons
-Shanelle of “Hair by Shanelle”: She cares for and styles both natural and relaxed hair for clients of all ages. Phone: (347) 262-1724

-To find other highly regarded salons that specialize in Black hair, you can visit the Salon Network by Essence online.

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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This is my last preschool prep “tackle” and it’s about keeping my kid safe. Here’s the thing… I know that Michael’s preschool is only 2 1/2 hours a day but this is the first time that we will be leaving him in the care of someone who is not a family member or a screened children’s ministry worker from our church. (My husband and I oversee the children’s ministry, so we’re very familiar with the volunteers.)

As such, I had some questions about “the safety talk”. I just wanted to make sure that Michael was clear about personal boundaries in an age-appropriate way. Honestly, my biggest concern was the bathroom at school. Being the “research” person that I am, I did some web research to see what the “experts” had to say AND I asked the real experts – my mom friends with children with kids who were going to preschool or who were already in preschool.

On the “expert” side, these were the sites that I found helpful:

-The Parents Site by the National Crime Prevention Council

-The KIDPOWER Teaching Kids to Be Safe Without Fear site

And

-The information that I personally found to be the most helpful was Scholastic’s article regarding talking about stranger safety.

From the moms, the input that helped me the most was:

-To remember that the state screens teachers. (”Even though we hear horror stories, the majority of teachers are really there to pass on the gift of education.”)

-The recommendation of a book “How and When to Tell Your Kids About Sex“, a book for the parents and then a series of 4 books for the kids that goes by age.

-To find out what the school bathroom policy is in order to ease my fears.

After visiting the preschool with my husband, my fears were put to rest. I immediately “fell in love with” the staff and I totally feel comfortable leaving Michael in their care. (Also the bathroom is in an open area - no closed doors – yay!) At the end of the day, I just had to: PRAY, put all of the advice into practice, PRAY and go with my “gut”. Isn’t that the most that we moms can do anyway?!

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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Growing up, one of my favorite annual memories was going shopping for the beginning of each school year. Now, as a parent, I was especially excited to go on the first school shopping spree for my son Michael who will be going to preschool next month.

To prepare, I went through all of Michael’s fall/winter clothes last Monday. That boy has a lot of clothes (that generous family members primarily bought), many of which he has never even worn! So, for him, he only needed a few new outfits and underclothes. He also needed a couple of pair of shoes, a rain coat, a backpack and school supplies. My (soon to be 18 months old son) Sean, on the other hand, needed a whole new wardrobe. (He’s not going to school or anything, but he will be with me at drop-off and pick-up.) At first, I was wondering where all of Michael’s clothes had gone (Sean had a ton of 12 months clothes from Michael). Then, I remembered that Michael was such a chunky baby that he pretty much skipped 18 months and went straight to 2T.

We set aside Saturday to go out to Long Island’s Roosevelt Field Mall in order to try to buy everything in one day. After two clothing store visits and one shoe store visit, we took a break for lunch. The shopping was fun for the most part. Michael really only cared about the backpack - Spiderman all the way. We almost had a meltdown while getting shoes at Stride Rite. Michael wanted to get these ugly (in my opinion) green and black Nickelodeon Slimers sneakers. No way. When he saw that wasn’t a possibility, he asked for the Nickelodeon Slimers Splatstomper Rain Boot. Normally, I wouldn’t pay $35 (why are they only $28 online?) for “ugly” rain boots BUT Stride Rite was having a “buy one, get one 1/2 price” sale, so I relented. (What can I say? I didn’t want to ruin his first school shopping experience.)

The backpack was almost as big as Michael!

Let's see...should I get the sneakers or the Slimers Splatstomper Rain Boots?

Enough shopping...let's get out of here!

Later that day, we met up with some family and friends for a family member’s birthday lunch celebration at The Cheesecake Factory. The portions were huge. I didn’t especially like my pasta dish but everyone else seemed to enjoy their meals. I did love their strawberry cheesecake though. (Cheesecake is one of my favorite desserts!) By the time lunch was over, I was exhausted. I decided that I would order online whatever shoes/clothing we hadn’t gotten already (sneakers and a rain coat for Michael; rain boots for Sean). On Saturday evening, I was able to find the rain coat and boots online at Target and the sneakers at Zappos. (I was also able to get the school supplies that evening near my home, but that’s a whole other post!)

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED (whew!)

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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As I run across information that I find useful in preparing for my son to go to pre-school, I’ll be sharing it with you. This week’s focus is “getting ready for pre-k” books.

-I read a really great article in the August Time Out New York Kids magazine, called “Favorite back-to-school books“. In the article, NYC librarians share some of the best school-themed books that will help kids get excited about going to school. You can find the article online here. (I’ve put some of the books on hold at my local library and I will be checking local bookstores to see what they have in stock.)

And

-I’ve mentioned before that I’m not a “flash card mama”. I prefer to teach my kids in a more natural way. At the same time though, I want to make sure that my son is set up to win in preschool. The workbook that we’re using to make sure that the general bases are covered is Comprehensive Curriculum of Basic Skills, Preschool. It’s pretty thick (almost 550) pages but very user-friendly. The four sections are: Basic Concepts and Skills; Writing Readiness; Reading Readiness and Mathematics Readiness. The writing sections are the ones that I find particularly helpful (those are the most challenging for my “want to get everything right the first time” left-handed boy). As an incentive, we give my son Michael a “check” every time that he completes a page. When every page has a check, he gets to pick out a special prize. (He’s already claimed his victor’s prize – a Wall.E. video game.)

The BIG Book

(To see what other moms around the web are “tackling” today visit Tackle it Tuesday).

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